The Hunger Meets Smoke’s Poutinerie

I’m going to tell you about the date me and Victoria went on last night. She’s wanted to go to this place called Smoke’s Poutinerie in Toronto for a while now. I’m a big fan of food, and she’s a big fan of poutine, so it was just a natural decision to make the trip.

So we drive down to Toronto, in the frigid weather, to their location on Dundas. This particular location is illuminated by the red lights of the gentleman’s club across the street. Charming to say the least.

The sign above their front door reads, “Parliament may prorogue but our girls work it every night!”

Even more charming.

So we get there, did I mention it was freezing cold? Like frigid.

I order the “Double Pork,” which is fresh cut fries, Montreal cheese curds, peppercorn gravy, pulled-pork, and bacon.

Lots of bacon.

The dish is served in a cute little brown box with the face of whom I’m assuming is Smoke, and it all comes steaming hot. Now you have to understand is that this is a $9 poutine here, and I’m willing to try anything once.

Oh my god.

Being the fool that I am, I ordered the regular, which is really jumbo seized based on the average person’s eating habits.

Victoria ordered the small traditional, which was more than enough. I tasted hers and it was quite delicious.

My poutine was just excessive, like even by my standards it was way too much food. There is probably four potatoes worth of french fries in the thing, there’s pulled pork and bacon everywhere.

I got through maybe %80 of the thing after falling victim to meat sweats and tummy aches. It’s delicious, but the guck that it has been turned into is now terrifying and I no longer want to live.

But I must keep eating, must.

No.

I can’t. It’s too much!

Ok. I’ve fallen victim, it’s game over, no more, I can’t go on. The remainder of this poutine will forever be remembered.

And for you Smokes, till next time! I’ll be getting the Country Style poutine. That would be slow roasted chicken breast, double smoked bacon, mushrooms, and caramelized onions.

Mmmmmmm.

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